"Is this, like, flattering? " David Duchovny sits in his trailer and warily eyes the paper in front of him. "The Semi-Official David Duchovny FAQ [Frequently Asked Questions] Sheet," it reads. "I guess," says Duchovny with an uneasy grin, "this shouldn't be too painful."
It shouldn't. After all, the FAQ sheet is the work of the David Duchovny Estrogen Brigade, one of at least two loose-knit collections of computer-literate women brought together by their appreciation for the sear of The X-Files. ( "Six-feet-one-inch tall. Mole on right cheek," reads the thumbnail sketch. "The rest is sheer poetry." ) Elsewhere on the Internet, fellow "X-Philes" fill up megabytes laying laurels at the feet of the 34-year-old actor, who was virtually unknown until he took the role of FBI agent Fox Mulder almost two seasons ago. "l think Ducatnip is a great name for him! He makes me purr like a kitten any time he removes so much as a sock," says one. They talk about his work, his personal life, his butt: When he appeared in one episode wearing a skimpy Speedo bathing suit, they lit up the Internet with the e-mail equivalent of heavy breathing. "I'm not a big fan of weeny bikinis, but he does have a body he should show off," reads another. Not long ago, an America Online newcomer foolishly wondered why the service needed two separate folders devoted to messages about Duchovny. The reply came quickly: "The drool is too heavy to be confined to one."
Duchovny skims the FAQ, clearly embarrassed. "This guy is great," he says, with a laugh, "whoever he is."
Whoever David Duchovny is, he's done more than just light up the Internet. Last January, The X-Files, a smart and unsettling drama about a pair of FBl agents who investigate cases with supernatural or paranormal explanations, forged its way into the mainstream, scoring an upset victory over NYPD Blue, Picket Fences and ER at the Golden Globes And in a rare occurrence for a Fox show, it even won its time slot.
It's a success that doesn't always sit well with The X-Files star, who is also the regular host of Zalman King's Red Shoe Diaries on Showtime "I didn't envision this when I started out, so I'm just trying to work it out as I go along," Duchovny says softly, eyeing the stacks of books piled high in his trailer (his favorite authors are Norman Mailer and Thomas Pynchon) "Sometimes it's gratifying, and sometimes I just detour into these rancid, dark moods, and I don't know where they're coming from."
On location today it's hard to tell just what kind of mood David Duchovny is in. Standing on a bridge that spans a small, icy river, an hour outside of Vancouver, the actor is underplaying a highly emotional scene opposite co-star Gillian Anderson (aka FBl agent Dana Scully). delivering lines that are barely audible to most onlookers. In between takes it's more of the same. While Anderson clowns around with director Rob Bowman, Duchovny remains near the railing, looking at the mountains and keeping mostly to himself. Then he overhears two crew members discussing how uncomfortable it must be for a pair of divers waiting in the frigid water below.
"If you want to keep warm,'' Duchovny volunteers, ' you've got to keep urinating in your wet suit."
"That's a pleasant thought," says one crew member.
"Well," Duchovny says with a shrug, "you could get somebody else to do it."
The deadpan delivery is typical. "Most people think that New Yorkers are energetic, in-your-face people," says Duchovny, who was born and raised in Manhattan. "But my brother used to tell his friends that I was retarded, because I was so quiet. They would speak very loudly and slowly to me, and that just made me more shy."
Duchovny's quiet nature never seemed to derail an academic career that eventually led to Princeton and Yale, where he won his bachelor's and master's degrees, respectively. He also taught at the later school, and was one dissertation short of a Ph.D. (topic: "Magic and Technology in Contemporary Poetry and Prose") when he made a move he now describes as pretty embarrassing, actually."
He'd already taken an acting course to aid him in writing a screenplay but badly needed to supplement his small stipend from Yale. "We went to bartenders school together," recalls actor Jason Beghe, Duchovny's best friend since ninth grade. "We got gigs at one place called the Continental on 13th Street in New York. It was dead, so we used to get smashed every night on Dom Perignon and stuff. I think we both got fired."
Beghe had started acting by this time, and persuaded Duchovny to audition for a TV commercial. "I thought that because of his credentials, being such a golden boy, he would appeal to the people who were hiring," says Beghe.
Although he didn't get the part, Duchovny immediately loved acting because it allowed him to be something less than the head of the class. "Like anybody, you go through life stifling or editing most of the things that you want to do," says Duchovny, back in his trailer and stroking his dog. Blue, a Border collie/terrier mix.
"And then all of a sudden you're onstage, and murderous anger is a good thing, pathetic weakness is great. I had all these things in me, and there was something in me that wanted to express them."
His older brother, Danny, saw it, too. "It's not that he ever acted like a goody-goody, but he probably felt locked in that role " says Danny. "My mother was really proud of his academic skills, and she pushed him hard in that direction."
Duchovny admits that his parents' divorce, which came when he was 11, had major repercussions. "However my family worked itself out," he says, "it became a technique of survival not to feel things too deeply. I was always supposed to be the one who didn't have any problems. And when I got to act, it was like all of a sudden I could have problems "
After finally getting a commercial (for Lowenbrau; "I was really lame," he reports), Duchovny moved into low-budget movies like New Year's Day and The Rapture, followed by a co-starring role in Kalifornla, with Brad Pitt and Juliette Lewis. Slowly, he says, he learned to play up his low-key nature, letting the camera catch his nuances.
Then came The X-Files. Duchovny liked the pilot, liked the character and hit it off with Anderson. "We instantly had a strong rapport," says the 26-year-old actress, adding with a laugh, "but I think David has a very strong rapport with most women."
The X-Files also looked tailor-made for an actor who wanted to be a movie star. "I thought we'd do six or twelve episodes at the most, and then I could move on to something else," he says. "But [series creator and executive producer] Chris Carter took it into a different ballpark and made it about anything inexplicable. He turned it from the most limited show on TV to the least limited one." Unconcerned with being glamorous -- according to Carter, one of the first things Duchovny said to the director of photography was "Don't make me look too good" -- he was also eager to add his input. "He's a very, very clear thinker," says Carter.
And now Duchovny is left to think about the consequences of the show's success. Internet gushing aside, he's had to give up his home in LA. and has little time with his girlfriend, actress Perrey Reeves (who was a vampire on the show last year) He's also too busy to make movies, nor does he have the time -- or the desire -- to read his poetry onstage. "I don't need to get up in front of people and have them love me as much as I used to," he says. "Now I feel like: 'Enough. Just leave me alone.' "
This sounds unduly harsh, so he begins to explain. He talks about a professor in graduate school who told him about a rich, handsome student he once had; the student let his grades slip, stopped bathing and lost his girlfriend. When the teacher asked why, the student explained, "I didn't know if anybody really liked me for who I am." The teacher's response, Duchovny says, was simple:" 'You bastard, just be thankful that anybody loves you at all.' "
Duchovny glances around the trailer, then continues. "I don't know how to say this without sounding like an idiot, but...people love me for the wrong reasons," he explains. "They love me because I'm on a TV show. So when I receive that love, there's something in me that is resentful. If somebody yells, 'Mulder!' I get pissed off and want to say, 'It's David.' But I shouldn't be like that, and so I have to smack myself and go, 'Be thankful anybody likes you for anything.' "
After struggling with this dilemma for a few more minutes, Duchovny stands up. "Was I too morose?" he asks. ''I get morose sometimes." Then he shrugs it off, pulls on Agent Mulder's coat and walks out of his trailer, toward the bridge.
Which brings us back to Duchovny's fans in cyberspace. "just a point of interest," wrote one. "In Ukrainian and Russian, Duchovny means 'of the ghost,' 'of the soul' or 'haunted.' Coincidence? I wonder."